I read this article today and I’d say that if you
have ever had issues with your parents, you should read it too.
About a year ago, I really started dealing with a
lot of my junk. I knew that I believed
lies but I was so caught up in them that I couldn’t see the truth. I was like a mosquito caught up in a black
widow spider’s web.
And awhile ago, I am not sure at one point it was
in my healing, I wrote a thank you letter for all the things my dad did for me
and I read it to him. I cried through
THE WHOLE THING!!! Poor guy, he’s seen
me cry about 6,453,278 times. What can I
say I am a crier.
Today, I was writing to a friend about a decision
she had to make about her daughter, and I thought about something happened when
I was 14 (and for all you peeps who think I’m so churched and never do anything
wrong… this is just icing on the poop cake of my life). When I was 14 (9th grade) 4 or 5
of my friends decided we’d go to a senior’s hall party. I don’t even remember how we got there. But my dad knew we were going (what a dummy,
I told him the truth LOL). We got there,
and just before we got there, the police arrived and shut it down. Now let me also interject here that we were
at Martin and Michigan which… was not the best of all neighborhoods, even back
then, certainly 4 or 5 14 year old girls didn’t need to be there. Everyone was FREAKING out, what are we going
to do??? Me… “I’ll just call my dad, he
will come get us”. Please note… for some reason mom’s seemed nicer and cooler
back then, but all my friends who had moms were scared out of their minds to
call. I called my dad from a pay phone (no cell phones back then) and my dad
came and got us. Not mad, but we all had
to pile (literally) in the back of his Chevrolet Celebrity). He made my friends call their moms just to
tell them they were at our house, and everyone spent the night. He even cooked us breakfast in the
morning. (for the record, he just thought we were going to a party and I didn't tell him where, just that we were going to a party)
Or how about the time when my friend picked me up
(I had a terrible migraine but went anyway) and she said we were going to hang
out with a guy that was her friend… and then later… after driving around for an
hour or two she wanted to get weed (I did not smoke it but she did – seriously I
always thought that stuff was STUPID) but she couldn’t find anyone… I wanted to
go home. She wouldn’t take me home. So… me
being the brain child I was and apparently not scared of anything got out of
the car when she stopped at a red light.
Who did I call? My dad. Thankfully he also taught me a good sense of
direction so I knew EXACLTY where I was.
I even called collect. LOL. Who
came and got me? My dad.
My dad taught me enough about right and wrong to
let me make choices (note I didn’t always make the right ones!) but to always
be a safe place I could call if I ran into trouble, and sometimes I ran
straight for it! I know that my dad is
gray and balding because of me. Poor
guy.
But let me also tell you this story. My dad was not only ALWAYS there to bail me
out of whatever mess I made (and not without consequences) but he was there to
watch me succeed.
When I was nine years old, I wanted to be able to
be able to drive the aluminum boat and inflatable raft out on my own. And technically, you need a boater’s license
to do that. My dad even taught the
classes. So I took the class. Every Thursday night for 4 weeks, we’d head
over to Lapham Community Center in Allen Park to take the class. I took the class, did the homework, and took
the test. And my dad never helped me. And to be honest until today, I really didn’t
believe that my dad cared whether I passed or failed because he never helped
me.
I passed.
One more wrong… and I would have failed (my dad did NOT grade my test,
he wanted it to be fair). My dad always
bragged about how I passed it all by myself and in my head there was a lie that
said “of course I did, because YOU never helped me!!!” but the truth is that he
didn’t help me because he wanted me to be successful and believe in
myself. (and for the record, I think
parents lack that these days, we are so worried that our kids won’t be able to
handle failure we make it impossible for them not to succeed, but they never
learn from their mistakes and sometimes that’s an important lesson).
I have had so many struggles because I didn’t
have a mom. Let’s face it, dads don’t
love like moms. Because well, they aren’t
moms. Duh.
I’m so thankful for my dad. He was a great dad. I feel sorry for you, because he’s mine all
mine!
And P.S.
he’s the best grandpa too!!!
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