Restoring my joy

Today I sang these words and probably they hit me today...

Lord, restore the joy I had
I have wandered, bring me back
In this darkness, lead me through
Until all I see is You


I headed to church for 5:30 service... Then as i pulled off the freeway at 5:06 I realized SERVICE IS AT 5!!! What the heck you big dummy! As I found my parking spot in the back and walked in, I just breathed in "please I need to hear from You today".

Need to. 

Not want to.

Need to.

I prayed before the rest of the songs were song and took a deep breath. I breathed Him in. Like I haven't in a long time. I pray, I worship in my car, but that connection today just like I knew my heart needed. 

I have a lot going on in my life. Lots of decisions to make. Things to take care of. In times like this when lots of things going on I tend to close up and that's not always the answer but it is my first defense to take care of myself.  It is my hope that after tonight my heart remains wide open to whatever God has for me, that I don't set up my own protections, but that I trust God to protect me and that I just love, wherever He calls me to go.

I hope that God restores the joy that I held back, that I don't just serve and love out of obedience but as a connection to God filled with joy.

Set my soul on fire, Lord, set my heart ablaze for You!

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