So many times I think… Am I even a Christian? Do I
look like a Christian? What does a Christian look like?
When I was growing up to me a “church lady” was
well dressed, looked well groomed and always held her tongue. And she could
quote the scriptures. She always seemed
to be smiling and encouraging.
Have you met me?
I mean yeah probably since you’re reading this.
I show up to church in jeans and sometimes I’d go
barefoot. My hair was sometimes(often) a
mess and sometimes I barely have makeup on.
I am not quiet and sometimes I cry in church, and sometimes I swear (in
real life)I feel like I could do so much better at loving people. I feel like I can always do more...
Yesterday someone sent me a text and asked if I’d
make a video answering a couple questions.
What
does it mean to pursue Holiness?Do you personally pursue a sinless life or a Jesus filled life?
Oh great.
I don’t know. I’m not that spiritual.
You know some days I feel like I'm just a blind squirrel trying to get a nut. I don’t have any great answers to what it means
to pursue holiness. HAHA but so I
answered it (in video form which is horrible for me)
What does it mean to pursue Holiness?I’ve found that if I try to purse things other than Jesus Himself, even the things of Jesus, I get caught up in the humanness of thinking. Holiness – set apart. I want to be set apart but not so much that people can’t relate to me or I can’t relate to them. Let’s face it, we are all imperfect, or in other words, jacked up. I don’t pursue Holiness per se because most days I am trying to get through them and I just want to be honoring to God. Do my best every day to do what the Bible says. Some days I do ok, and some days, I end it on my knees asking for forgiveness and hoping I do better the next day.
Do you personally pursue a sinless life or a
Jesus filled life?
I pursue a life filled with Jesus. If I focus on trying a sinless life I will
get tripped up, because I get focused on
sin, then it seems I see it around every corner and it grabs me up like a crazy
lady trying to get that 57” TV at Walmart for $49 however if I focus on Jesus
then that’s what I see. I don’t even
know if that makes any sense. Where your
eyes go, your heart goes, so I set my eyes on Jesus, and my heart will quickly
follow.
So there you go.
Short and sweet.
I don’t know if those were church lady answers
but they were my answers. I just want to
love Jesus and love others.
Maybe I’m changing the way church ladies
look… jeans and t-shirts and real talk.
Sometimes I wonder what the heck God is thinking
or why He doesn’t just come down and take care of a few things… Like why is
Montana in need of rain and Texas and Florida got too much. I know God is good,
but what the heck is that about? Or why
people who really want babies can’t get pregnant and people who aren’t exactly
thrilled get them. What’s that about
too? I mean I trust God and stuff but I just wonder… And that doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of wondering why He chose me...
I don’t know if I fit the mold of a God loving
person, but I do. I just am a little rough
around the edges.
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