Control

 

I was thinking about how control is perceived by others...

I do believe that in a lot of instances someone needs to be in charge. Someone must be the chaos coordinator! 

I think of the simplest of things, peanut butter and  jelly sandwiches. Everyone the right way to make a pb&j is to take two slices of bread, open them like a book so that when you close the sandwich everything is lined up (and if you have to rip off the crust it matches better). Peanut butter goes on the left bread and jelly on the right bread.  The perfect pb&j is creamy peanut butter and strawberry jelly. 

I actually know someone who makes it putting the pb and jelly ON THE SAME SIDE! can i get a collective gasp! The horror of it all! It's the Texas Chainsaw Massacre of sandwich making! 😂

What about people who eat raspberries jelly or apricot, and don't even get me started with those heathens who use CRUNCHY peanut butter! 

Now... of course I'm mostly kidding. Except opening the bread like a book. I am not kidding about that AT ALL! 

Or when kids start doing chores like folding towels and there is always that parent who comes after their kids and refolds them "right".  Sure, i know they fit in the closet or on the shelf better, but the child is helping and learning what it feel like to be a contributor of the family.  When towels are corrected, how do you think that makes the child feel? I think it instills "I'll never do anything right"

I've been working on my own control issues. And anyone on our sales team will tell you, sometimes i do great and sometimes I could use some more work.  I'm thankful for their grace. 

I can tell you that when I'm processing something verbally it is frustrating when someone corrects me right away instead of letting me work through it all the way tot the end. I am also terrible at this. WIP 🚧 

I think about when I'm in the kitchen doing things with others. I typically have the "right way" to do something but that doesn't mean I'm actually right (when it comes to plastic ware and napkins at the end of the buffet, I'm 100% correct!) but based on my experience of (a LOT) of trial and error, it works. 

I'm learning to let go of control. Because in many cases, control can seem like insecurity and I want everyone to see what i can do. Over-achiever complex.  Organization, processes and procedures are necessary but CONTROL is not. And there is a big difference. (True story one time i color coordinated a 1500 Easter egg hunt with what was inside!!) 

That being said. Make your pb&j the way you want (but I'm right about the opening the bread like a book) and put your plasticware and napkins at the end, but the rest... eh just figure out what works for everyone's health (mental, emotional, and physical).