It’s Friday and this Friday is no different from any other… I’m tired.
Tonight we’re going to watch a DVD at some friends… Its supposed to be funny but I hope I don’t fall asleep.
I haven’t slept well the last week or so… last night being the first night in a week I slept all the way through the night in my bed (meaning I didn’t sleep on the couch). I’ve got way too much on my mind… coupled with the fact that whenever I talk to someone about it (I’ve got just a few people I trust to talk about such things) everyone has a different opinion…. AHHHHHHHH!!! I need to have dinner with Sara!
When people ask me if I’m “ok”… I think… I wear my emotions on my sleeve, so you’ve got to know that I’m not. I’m doing my best (which really isn’t all that great) to keep it together. Christ is my glue, and seems to be speaking to me and I’m blown away by His word (yes, I’m still reading it in the mornings) but He’s not speaking to me about what I keep asking Him. Ugh! I hate when the answer doesn’t come when I want it. That means I’m still supposed to be still. Ugh! I hate being still.
I keep thinking about this one ministry opportunity… I’m standing on the edge… waiting to make mention of it… I want to and I think God wants me to… I’m just waiting…
Phyllis is selling Subi Beads again for Light Gives Heat, I love to see her excited about it. Oh, I know that everyone thinks their children can change the world… but I really think my can and does. If only in my world, she’s changed it, she brings light to my life that I never thought possible. I think about in how many ways she has made a difference, even in just selling necklaces or loving in Colombia, and in her school. I said to her this morning “you’re a World Changer” and I meant it. I can’t even tell you how awesome I think she is. She even brings light to the boring periodic table when studying for Chemistry.
I’m overwhelmed with thinking about the holidays coming up. I can’t believe it’s almost Halloween and Christmas will be here before we know it. I love the holidays, I love being off. I hate snow, but I love that the earth is at rest preparing for the spring.
And thinking about that, isn’t it amazing how God just orchestrated it all. How in His greatness, He knows that we need rest. He knows that no matter how glorious and beautiful things are, they need to rest. And thinking about just the earth, how He has designed us, that we are wonderfully made, that He knows everything about us. And in knowing all about us, He loves us in spite of ourselves.
So that’s a whole lot of rambling and I didn’t really even scratch the surface of what’s rolling around in the dark and scary place I call my mind.
And I'd like to know when the babies are coming! that's driving me crazy too!!
Thanks for tuning in… peace out.