Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and
optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it
through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)
The centurion replied, “Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. (Matthew 8:8 NIV)
I used to think that putting myself down made me humble. Boy, was that wrong. I know now that it was just pride. It was my very weird way of gettin people to say that I wasn't. I also had a hard time accepting a compliment. Because... Well.. I didn't like myself. And I couldn't figure out why anyone would say anything nice about me. Somehow I was convinced that I was looking at a reflection of me, but really it was a pile of poop.
Well, finally! I've been freed from the mess!!! I still know that I'm a wretch, because I'm a sinner, but I know and finally truly believe that God loves me and I can trust Him. He created me beautiful, worthy to be loved, an clearly chosen by Him.
That verse. That guy gets it. Jesus - I'm not worthy to be around You, I don't deserve to breathe the same air as you... But Dude! If you say I'm healed, I'm believing You!
That's how I feel. I know I'm not worthy on my own, but if God says "I'm free" (So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. (John 8:36 NIV)) I'm believing Him! I'm living in freedom! Not going back! If I say some dumb thing out of an old habit, I'm saying I'm sorry (& meaning it) and moving on taking each step towards Love.
It's an amazing thing believing who God says I am! Walking in freedom and thinking "I don't know about all this, but I'm trusting You, and I'm in it for Love, and Love wins!!
I was thinking about how I don't like to ask for help and how stupid that is.
Yesterday some friends came over and I asked if they could change some light bulbs on the light fixture on the landing and put up some smoke detectors. It was such an incredible blessing to me!!! I have hated to hit the light switch and then realize the light bulbs were out (I have done this for over a month) but I'm always nervous to change them because sometimes I'm a little clumsy and I was afraid to fall down the stairs (I've fallen down them just walking). And about a month ago I realized there was no smoke detector upstairs in Phyl's room or in the hallway. And I'm sure I could have figured out how to hang them... But I just am not good at those things. So I asked for help.
A lot of times I don't ask for help because I don't want to bother people. Or maybe it's a pride thing. Gasp! You mean they will know I can't do it all?! Well! I can't!!!
The truth is I have friends who would really struggle with cooking a fundraiser dinner but I can whip it up in sleep... But I cannot use a drill (true story, my dad told me I'm not allowed & I'm ok with that!).
Letting someone do something for me is like hugging them back when they hug me. I know i serve a lot of people. I serve them because i look at people like in the verse Matthew 25 or maybe I look at it like I'm loving them like Jesus. I don't serve to get anything in return. I just don't. I kist love them so i want to serve Them. But I know that sometimes people feel bad if they are always the one being served. (Serving/loving might come so naturally to them they don't even realize they do it).
I look at serving and being served is like hugging someone and getting hugged back! Both are completely natural when our heart is completely open.
I was on my way to work this morning after stopping at the bank and I drove by this woman who was homeless. You know I’ve got issues with people who aren’t really homeless but stand at the side of the road and act like they are, it drives me crazy. But clearly this woman was homeless, she was in the shelter of a doorway in a building. She wasn’t asking for anything, she was just trying to stay dry. We will start to see more and more homeless because it’s warming up and so they aren’t staying places to keep warm.
My view today on my way to work
Anyway… I went to McDonald’s and got her breakfast. I wasn’t sure what it was that she’d want (is it weird that I thought that??) I got her a biscuit sandwich thinking it would be easier to eat than an Egg McMuffin because sometimes homeless people have teeth problems (oh the weird facts I know) and a coffee and a coke.
When I dropped it off to her, she looked at me like I was a weirdo (well, she might have been homeless but she was spot on with that one!) and I wasn’t there for longer than 2 minutes I think but it seemed like I spent a long time with her. I gave her coffee and coke, and gave her the food. She actually wouldn’t take the food from my hand, so I set her food on her “home” and told her that Jesus loves her and told her about a soup kitchen for lunch and dinner.
I drove away and cried thinking about this passage of scripture
31 “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. 34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’ 37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ 40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ 41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’ 44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’ 45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’ 46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
I thought about how I’ve been praying to be in step with God, that I would see Him in my every day.
I don’t know about you, but sometimes I get so wrapped up in what I am going to do in the future, I forget about today. I am chomping at the bit to start the non-profit, and buy a building and fix up a building and hear children run around but honestly I forget to serve right now. And I don’t tell you this because I want you to think about what I can do… but what God can do. Yesterday I was planning and praying about The Detroit Mission Trip that I didn’t think about my own city (I HATE THAT ABOUT ME!!) . I wonder how many times I miss an opportunity to serve right now, because He does call us to do small things and will later trust us with bigger things. (Luke 16:10 “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.) And even though I am not always faithful, He is. And I'm thankful that even though I miss opportunities to serve Him, He blesses me with new ones.
I want to tell you, I am was in adoring the sky the today, and God took my focus off the sky and on to one of the most beautiful things He created, that beautiful woman. And I mean it, she was absolutely beautiful (and she was missing teeth – good choice on the biscuit). I am thankful for the God moment this morning, I am overwhelmed by His grace and letting me serve Him.
If you can’t feed 100, then just feed one ~Mother Teresa
My friend commented on one of my statuses that she was beginning to think that I was God's favorites. Since I'm an only child, I always think I'm the favorite anyway!
Do you know I think that all the time ? Surely He is beyond good to me! Sometimes I think about having two sets of sheets for my bed and I'm overwhelmed to tears. Or a check arrives that I wasn't expecting so it goes straight to the account I'm going to set up for the non profit. Or I just think about how perfect my house is for me :) and my family.
I could go on and on about how God loves me, and you can ask me, but you better pack a lunch because we will be there for a long time!
I think about how much my love for Him has grown and grown! And how it's just not that i love God but that I adore Him and I trust Him.
That might sound crazy to you, but to me it sounds perfect.
I found myself wanting to fight this morning. Now, at one time in my life I might have just thought that is normal. Maybe someone needs to be put in their place, and certainly I can be the girl for the job. But that's not how I am now. So I start really getting to the core.
Fear.
I've been wondering so much, are You sure God?? Surely I am not equipped. And where am I going to get the money? How this and how that? And a lot of "are you sures??" I mean I already love a building and its got tons of character and tons of broken windows. Oh and when/if I get the money to buy the building how will I get the money to pay for the things that need repaired.
And so I asked for prayer and started my list of thankfuls.
Dear God,
Remember when I was little and You gave me the desire to be a teacher, well, God I'm sorry I gave up on that dream. But God thanks for never getting rid of my desire and love for muffins. And God, thanks for letting me love the craziest of kids, and thanks for making Phyllis not crazy :) and God thank You for teaching me that hard work matters. And thank you for your grace when I didn't. Thank you for giving me that i can do and ill never give up attitude. thanks for helping me to let go of pain and the ability to hold on to sweet memories. And thank You for my crazy desire to cook and thank you for calling me to go on mission trips and thank you for helping me to recognize that every day and every step I take is a mission trip because that's what my life is. And thank you that even though today I look like I should be Haiti not an office, thanks for my skirt to remember that you called me to do crazy things. And God thanks for Marianna that you put in my path on Saturday God to remind you are everywhere and that I could see you in her and thanks that I got to ask that other little girl the name of her dog in Spanish.
And God it comes to no surprise to you, but I'm scared. I'm afraid of mucking it all up and then my life doesn't point to You.
God I know this fear is separating me from you because its painful, so God I'm holding on with both hands, and I'm not letting go. I can't make it without you. I loveyou and I thank you that you never ever let me go!!
God please keep my feet in complete step with yours. I loveyou.
Exciting news… I bought new front tires. The truth is that last time it rained I was made fully aware (I really kind of already knew) that I needed new tires when I hydroplaned in the rain on the lodge at the 94 interchange. That was a couple weeks ago, I just didn’t have the time to go get the tires. I carved out time on Saturday to take care of this very important need. It’s done now. Things like that remind me that I need a husband. I hate taking care of car stuff, even though I can… I don’t like it.
I also planted my garden this weekend, I know that technically, according to my very awesome landscaper and friend Drew, I am not supposed to plant until after Memorial Day, I had to get it done. And so I did. I love planting my garden, I really needed to get the black sheet to cover it so I get fewer weeds, but I will do it the hard way and put it down now. Story of my life… doing it the hard way.
I was pulling weeds and thinking that I am so glad I’ve slowed down my life(I’ve got a post rolling around in my head about life lessons and gardening), I really do love being domesticated! I love taking care of my family, and certainly, I like having a clean house. I’ve stopped doing a lot of things so that I can take care of me and my family. And I love that the weather has finally decided to be nice, so when I meet with friends, it won’t be to eat but to walk! Which is good for my body and my pocket book!
I love Jesus, I really would like to be a proverbs woman. Like seriously, I know that just like I had to work on the fruit of the spirit, I have to work on that too, and as I grow closer to Jesus, and listening to His heart for me, I become more like that woman He has created me to be.
And by the way… I need someone to hold me accountable to do my bible study, I stunk it up last week… only did the book twice :/ But for the record, I prayed, read the bible, just didn’t do my study (I don’t replace prayer or reading with my study, it’s an addition)
Proverbs 31:10-31 10 [b]A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. 12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. 13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. 15 She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. 16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 17 She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. 18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. 19 In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. 21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. 25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. 26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 31 Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate
This is the box from my Subi beads
I love the sayings all over the box!
I caught myself at times today just grinning. Nothing exceptional was going on I would be standing there and I would catch myself overcome.
Today was an act of obedience. I serve/go with/to in Detroit that I really love. Today they had an outreach. I'm not really sure if they needed me, they had great volunteers. But really I felt like I needed to be there so I signed up.
And actually, after getting new tires and going to the local farm market I was tired. I showed up and it was kind of funny because there wasn't really anything for me to do so they asked me to round up some kids for the "free toy give away". I went and invited the cutest little girl. Her abuela (gma) said she was shy. And honestly I turned around and walked to the next "muffin" and God said "go get her" so i invited her to hang out with me. We went over played a couple games, she got her face painted, and then she worshipped in song, listened to the story of Jesus, we hung out for 2.5 hours.
I'm not gonna lie, there were moments that were uncomfortable for me because I tend to be task oriented. But let me tell you, those hours were a complete gift from God for me.
Her smile. Watching her dance that last song all by herself! Watching her start as a very shy girl to this outgoing "I want to dance with buddy" girl, it was a complete gift.
Obey.
God so many times has told me that I need to open myself up, "be relational Margie, I called you to love, Margie, I created you for that, and that alone".
All those things need to be done. Yes, and I will continue to be open to serve where He has called, and I will love.
Today's act of obedience as He called me to step outside of me and a step closer to Him, which, is one of the greatest gifts He has given me.
Thank You Jesus for loving me, thank You for creating me to love You and the people You love.
We will never value what God values until we give back to Him what is already His. ~barefoot church
Sometimes (ok almost every time) I think about the thought of the community center I think "really me?"
I remember telling someone I love and respect what I am going to do and they literally looked at me like "yeah right" which I completely understand. How could this single mom who is always busy find the time, let alone the funds to do such a thing? Well, I don't know. But God!
I will admit that my retirement account sucks and its getting better bit no where near what it should be there are a lot of reasons for that. I wonder... When the community center opens and I need to quit my job, what on earth will happen to my retirement savings. And then I think if the verse that says that we are not to worry about tomorrow today has enough troubles of its own, so that doesn't mean that I stop thinking about it or that I don't prepare it means, simply, I do what I know to do... And let God handle the rest.
I don't claim to have all the answers but I plant my garden and spend less on food in the summer, I make my own tea instead of stopping at Starbucks, I means less becomes more because it means more.
I think I'm nuts so I can only imagine what others think. But God... He thinks I'm awesome and beautiful.
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:10 NLT)
My friend netta once told me that any book in the bible can lead someone to Jesus or something like that.
We just finished a 6 week study by Beth Moore called the law of love. I don't think I could have handled more than 6 weeks honestly. Sometimes I've got the attention span of a gnat and add in warm weather I just think its timing was perfect.
Quite often I used to think of the book of Deuteronomy as a book of rules... Well... It is the book of the law, so that actually makes complete sense. But after this study, I really see the love in the words that are written. I told my friend Gail - I can see why this book would lead someone to Christ not in a hell fire and brimstone sort if way but in a God is love sort of way.
I will tell you, my life isn't perfect oh for goodness sake, it's far from perfect and there are lots of things that I wish I could do differently but I can't change the decisions I've made but I can humbly come before the King of Kings and ask for forgiveness and the way that He thinks I should go.
Lately I just cannot control my tears. I find myself walking through a parking lot, arm in the air singing and tears in my eyes.
He is just too good to me.
So if you see me crying, it's probably not because I'm sad, it's because I'm completely overwhelmed with the greatness of God.
Maybe eating healthy comes easy for you. It seems like it’s a lot of work for me, and honestly, sometimes I just want to throw in the towel and end up looking like a line backer. Add going organic to the whole mix of things… and it’s enough to make me want to jump off the roof of the grocery store.
But the problem is… I can’t find the stairs to the roof… and putting healthy things in my body makes me feel better, my attitude is better, I poop better (ok whatever, get over yourself if you don’t poop – waste wasn’t meant to stay in your body). A garden seems very overwhelming to someone who is going to be on 3 mission trips in one summer. But what is the alternative? Quite frankly, I don’t feel like there is one.
I ordered the Crockin Girls Clean Crocking Cook Book a couple days ago. I go into Meijer and pick up a few staples here and there as to not overwhelm myself with crazy grocery bills! Yes, I am aware that I am spending the same amount but it seems less painful this way.
Also, eating clean and not “out” is not convenient for my crazy busy lifestyle. It means I have to plan, cook, clean, HOWEVER, my own cooked food tastes better, it’s healthier, and even with buying organic, its cheaper.
So I think I will be cleaning out my pantry this weekend and donating some food to some people I love. All of this is work, but anything worth having is work. And being healthy is worth the work. This is also going to help me so that I have less stuff to move!!
I’ll be sharing any good recipes I get for my crock pot! We can’t do this alone! We have got to encourage each other!! And help each other out! I’ll be checking out websites and blogs of people who are doing the same things! I did sign up for Nature Box for some new ideas for snacks, I will let you know how that turns out!
As my friend Robin Torres says “We got this!!”
Ecc 4:9 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor
And have you noticed how many bad for you recipes are shared on FB?? Thank you to those who share healthy alternatives!! Let's help each other!
I love my crockpot but often the recipes are full of cream of soups or I just don't think they have enough flavor.
I saw this great recipe about 10 people's Facebook but I just don't have time to make that kind of dinner during the week so I decided to tweak the recipe a little and make it in my crockpot. I love my crockpot!!
If this recipe comes out as good as I think it might, this could be a staple recipe in our house.
I used hormone free chicken, organic lemons, garlic, olive oil, and potatoes. The green beans I had frozen so I wanted to use them up (to make room for more organic stuff).
Chicken, potatoes, and green beans
6T olive oil
2 lemons
-1 sliced
-1 juiced
4 cloves garlic (I might have added 5 haha!)
1t sea salt
1/2 t pepper
1 lb green beans
1 lb chicken breast (cut in cubes)
2 russet potatoes, cut in large chunks
In a small container combine the first 5 ingredients
In a large bowl, toss grean beans with half of the lemon/garlic mixture
Put in crockpot
Put chicken and potatoes in same big bowl, mix with remaining lemon/garlic mixture. Top green beans.
