Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)

Sunday, April 19, 2015

A to Z faith - never


If there is one thing I've learned is that i should not tell God what I'm never going to do. Mostly because He knows WAY better than me.

I told him I never ever under no circumstances did I want to go to Haiti. Good thing He didn't listen to me because it's one of my favorite places on earth. I've learned some of my hardest and bestest lessons in Haiti.

Remember the first time I came to Germany? I was so excited and it ended up being a terrible!!!!!!! trip. I never wanted to come back here, EVER EVER EVER AGAIN!!!  But at the last minute (while in Haiti ha!) I found out I was coming for almost two weeks! Gah! But honestly this trip, though it would have been better with a friend, has been sooooooooo awesome!! I've been brave and done a lot of exploring (and walking)! I've learned a lot about myself and I'm certainly braver than I think or feel. When things got tough the other day I listened to the miracles in the gospel of Mark and the next day the teachings of Jesus in Matthew. CLING to the word of God!!

But it's not just about what I'm NEVER gonna do, it's about not bossing God.

I always wanted 6 kids (holy moly!) but I have one biological. You'd think I'd be sad... About what I'm missing. Except that I've got kids all over! Stitched in my heart. And certainly my schedule would be a lot harder with 6 kids.  Thankfully my friends keep having kids so I can be an auntie!! And enjoy doing fun things.

Now sometimes God gives me what I ask for, but I've learned to pray "if it's Your will, and if it's not, please give me peace to accept it".

As much as I'd like to have my own way, I NEVER want to do anything contrary to His will!

Saturday, April 18, 2015

A to Z faith - me

So it kind of seems funny to write about me when I'm talking about my faith, because if it's one thing I've learned about Jesus is that it's not about me ;)
And to prove how much Jesus works in my heart, I'll give you some comparisons of me and Him

It's the me in me that would stay by myself, never risk hurt or heartache 

It's the Jesus in me who reaches out, establishes relationships and continues to nurture them even when I'm hurt.

It's the me in me that would never help anyone... I'd leave people to their own demise.

It's the Jesus in me that gives generously that volunteers, that extends a hand to help

It's the me in me that gets big and loud so that no one else can be heard, so that I will be. Proud and arrogant 

It's the Jesus in me that leads quietly, listens, and doesn't care if I get my way or even if I'm heard. Gentle and humble

It's the me in me that when I'm scared gets mean and angry

It's the Jesus in me that trudges on, even if I'm scared, because I know there is nothing that hand of God can't redeem or heal

It's the me in me who thinks people must always "earn it" 

It's the Jesus in me who donates to people going on missions that I think are lazy because they will carry out the call of God on their life.

That's just a few examples... I could go on for years...

I'm so thankful the Jesus in me is there

Friday, April 17, 2015

A to Z Faith - Love

1 John 4:16

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.

God is love. 

Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

A to Z Faith - Kindness

Do not mistake my kindness for weakness

I’ve said that a million times… maybe more. I’ve said it in my personal life and in my work life.  Some people may not believe this, but sometimes I really have to work at being kind.  But just because I make kind gestures, it doesn’t mean I am weak, it actually shows Christ’s strength in me.

Oh, sure, it’s easy when I love someone to extend a kind gesture, but to someone who has been a jerk to me or I just don’t like… well, I have to work at it.

The Oxford definition of Kindness
the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate

It’s a fruit of the spirit…
Love, joy peace, patience, goodness, kindness, gentleness, and self control

Gal 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

I wish that kindness always came easy for me, but I’m a jerk…  lol 

So be encouraged, as God works in my heart, kindness comes easier and easier and almost seems like a new way of life for me, and as He works in your life, I hope the same is true for you!

2 Cor 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:The old has gone, the new is here!

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

A to Z Faith - Jesus

Sometimes life is crazy and my light seems to dim.  It never burns completely out, but it grows dim if I don’t spend time with Jesus. If I rush through my time with Him, I feel empty and cheated, and I only do it to myself, which is dumb. 

Today I listened to the song “A little longer” by Bethel.  It reminded me that my time with Jesus is the most precious thing.  It makes my heart full, it guides me to the paths of all that He has for me.  

When I begin to question or get confused, it is because I have not been connected to the source of who I am.

When I get overwhelmed, I can just breathe in His name, Jesus.  Over and over again, and instead of Him calming the seas, He calms His child.

I think of the people in the past year that are leaving my current location.  First the Dorbands, then the Chiltons.  I have prayed “God please send me to be with the Dorbands” and I have even said to God “why did You bring me back to Courage if You were taking them away?” and He said to me “do you follow people or do you follow Me?”  OUCH.

I will go or stay wherever Jesus guides me.  I want to always remember all He has done for me.  Salvation.  Joy.  A place with the Father.  Peace.  I want always remember to stay with Him a little longer.  I am in love with Him for who He is.  I’m thankful He is Lord over my life, not just my Savior, I find such peace in letting Him tell me what to do, to guide me, to love me. 

I am so thankful for my sweet sweet Jesus.

Matthew 22:37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

A to Z faith - I AM

I've known all along that "i" would be 


I wasn't sure what I'd write because there isnt much to say because God is "I AM"

To be honest the last couple days have been rough. This one guy has been putting me down left and right, making rude comments. It's just not me, it's a lot of people. It's one of those things that he tries to raise himself up by putting others down. It doesn't work like that though, really he looked more and more like a jerk and he made people uncomfortable.

But I know that I belong to the Great I AM.

God said to Moses, “ I am who I am. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘ I am has sent me to you.’ ” (Exodus 3:14 NIV)

I only know a small amount of who God is but I do know He's my Lord and Savior. And I know I belong to Him.

So no matter what anyone says, I know who i am in Him. 

I'm thankful He is who He says He is! I AM!

Monday, April 13, 2015

A to Z Faith - Healed Heart

I don’t know about you, but I was in need of some deep healing when God found me and rescued me as I put my hands up and let Him pull me out of the mess I had gotten myself into.

Some things were really easy for me to allow God to work in my heart and there were somethings that had become such a “normal” to be that I didn’t even know I needed healing.  It was after much time, I had something that had caused “internal bleeding”, it was after much work and prayer, I was able to go the ultimate Healer and find the kind of healing I never even knew possible. And in that healing, I found a kind of freedom I never knew possible.  I cannot believe how much pain I inflicted on others not knowing the pain I carried around for so long…  That really breaks my heart.  I am thankful for the forgiveness that I was able to give in my heart to the one who hurt me, and to be able to ask God for forgiveness that I need to accept for my own sin.

Luke 5:27-32 27 After this, Jesus went out and saw a tax collector by the name of Levi sitting at his tax booth. “Follow me,” Jesus said to him, 28 and Levi got up, left everything and followed him.
29 Then Levi held a great banquet for Jesus at his house, and a large crowd of tax collectors and others were eating with them. 30 But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who belonged to their sect complained to his disciples, “Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?”
31 Jesus answered them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. 32 I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.”

My heart is healed <3 p="">

Sunday, April 12, 2015

A to Z faith - grace

I'm sitting in this beautiful church in mainz germany. I happen to catch the last of mass and was so in awe of the beauty of this building. The stained glass, the stone work, the statues, the pughs. 

Often the Catholic Church gets a bad name because of its "rules" but I must say that I love the modern church, but i do love the reverence of the Catholic Church. 

I love the respect that people have for its buildings and for its religion.

One thing for me (and this is about me!!! Not judging anyone), I never learned about a relationship with God and Jesus. God was someone to be feared for the punishment I'd get if I did something wrong (sinned).

When I came to the Baptist church, I learned of God's grace. I did not deserve it, and God paid a mighty price for it. 

It was not until I went to Metro that I learned how to accept it and give it. Grace.

I'm not sure how to describe it, really, it's something more to be experienced but I looked up the definition
(in Christian belief) the free and unmerited favor of God, as manifested in the salvation of sinners and the bestowal of blessings.

I'm so thankful for unmerited favor, for forgiveness of my sins.

I noticed as people left the church (I'm still sitting here in a Pugh writing) they seemed so sad, I wanted to say "rejoice, be glad! He has saved us!!" Unfortunately I don't speak the language... But I smiled, that is a universal language!

I'm so very thankful for Jesus. I'm thankful for this time, while it be ever so short, in this church as I thanked Him for just a short list of my blessings, especially for His grace.

May you give it as you've received it, grace.