Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)

Thursday, October 15, 2009

My fruit fell off and nobody saw!

I was in Kroger today and ran into a woman that was the mother of Phyllis's friend when she went to Christ the Good Shepherd school. I looked at her and all her meanness came flooding back to me! All the mean things her daughter said to Phyllis when I had to pull her from that school. Which, by the way, was a GREAT school, and the church was great too! So this post is not a bash on the school or the church or the Catholic religion... please note that!

Her daughter said to Phyllis "my mom works in an ice cream shop and your mom is a business woman, how come my mom can afford it but your mom can't?" Let me just say that my taxes were going up AND tuition has more than doubled in the 5 years that she had attended there. I had my house which was a bigger expense than my apartment (mortgage, utilities, etc). And I really already felt bad enough, but I felt like we just couldn't afford it. I have NEVER recieved not one penny of child support, and I believe because of God's unending grace, that I have made a good life for us, not perfect, but good. And please also not, it's because of God's grace, not me!

I think this woman tried to dodge me in the aisle way, but at that moment I decided to go to the high road and just say hello! So I did. And then was trampled by all these feelings of remembering about how the parents of Phyllis's friends acted like they were my friend, and the day after I made "the big announcement" I could feel a difference with a lot of them. Very disappointing. That says a lot about their character if you ask me. And then... she got stuck at the Uscan next to me, I tried making conversation... but it was difficult. I really wondered, "what did I EVER do to you to make you so hateful towards me?" and then I just wanted to say "its because of people like you that people are driven from church!" but I didn't. (I could hear my fruit falling if no one else could) I walked away.

I thought about how it's so much better to build someone up instead of tearing them down. How I was JUST reading today about encouraging each other. You know it's not always when people are at the top of their game that they need encouraging, it's when they are low. If you're at the top of the hill do you need someone to boost you up? NO! It's when you're at the bottom of the mountain, in the valley, that you need that boost to stand on the top and see God's vast beauty.

“How great you are, O Sovereign LORD! There is no one like you, and there is no God but you, as we have heard with our own ears.”- 2 Samuel 7:22

Dear Lord, thank you for where I am, thank you for never giving up on me, thank you for your grace, and your unending mercy. God I thank you for changing the way I look at things, I thank you for your word that is encouraging, I thank you for the friends that you have put in my path to love me, and to teach me to love. God, I thank you for your son. I just thank you, I'm forever Yours.

2 Thes 2:16-17 16May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, 17encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.

Say His Name within the darkest hour
And see His light illuminate our path
The road is narrow but our gaze is set
On the love of Christ ‘til the very end

We walk in the truth that overcame our sin
Leaving our past and how we once had lived
Giving our lives to see
Your Name made known
‘Cause the love of Christ is what the world needs most

So Lord
Lead us in the ways of Your love
To lead a broken world to Your cross
Lead us in the ways of Your love

We are Yours forever
Our lives won’t be the same
Yours forever our eyes won’t turn away
Yours forever
[ Hillsong Lyrics are found on ]

We sing Your praises ‘til our lungs give out
To the hope of the world
The One who gave us life
Giving our lives to see
Your Name made known
‘Cause the love of Christ is
What the world needs most

We are Yours forever
Our lives won’t be the same
Yours forever our eyes won’t turn away
Yours forever our lives won’t be the same
Yours forever our eyes won’t turn away

We’re living in the One who gave
His life to see our sin erased
We know
We know
Our hope is never gonna fade away

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