Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

oh boy... why can't I trust!

Ok, so I'm sitting in the kitchen and I'm about to lose my mind. My heart is breaking.

"just because we're forgiven doesn't mean there isn't consequences"

My daughter wants to go away to college. And I can't afford it because of the choices I've made.

I live in one of those 'catch 22' situations. I make too much for her to get free college (grants) but I don't make enough to pay for it myself. Ugh. I figured it out. If I get rid of the house, live in a $500/month apartment and no cable, i might be able to pay for her college. That is if she gets no scholarships. Now hopefully she will. College is the only thing really that we argue about, and its stupid.

"don't you trust Me".

Oh, do we have to go there today God?

I trusted Him to provide a way for her to go to that summerstudio in June, and before I asked, there was an envelope on the counter that had the answer. That's how my God works.

I gotta trust in the small stuff and the big stuff.

Praying for open doors. And we will walk right through.

I've got to just realize that His grace covers my sins. And His grace can pay for college. And His grace will lead me Home.

2 Cor 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.


Louise said...

You're learning my friend ... be kind to yourself in the process.

jessicachubb said...

I know how much your really would love her to be debt free, but student loan debt is not the end of the world. It is low interest, low monthly payment and has high rewards. Trust God and know it will work out.

Constance said...

In our situation college is horribly expensive! Charlie has had a passion for Meteorology since he was 9-10 years old. The best School of Meteorology in the country? University of Oklahoma (OU) in Norman, OK. It's less than 3 hours from home but the out of state tuition is killer! When we moved to Denton, north of DFW we were teased about living in Southern OK, (we are *45 miles south of the OK border) of if that were only true!!!

I researched on line and found out that the Community College in Frisco, TX (5 minutes from our daughter Jessica's house) has an equivelency table and which courses he can take to fill OU's requirements of transfer. So, this past Fall, he moved in with Jessica and Steven and we pay room & board for him there (he chips in as well).

For US, this has been a great solution. He's learning to be responsible under the protective arm of family and getting his first 2 years of college done locally. He's only 45 minutes away so we get to see him more frequently. He'll graduate in 2011 with his 2 year degree then transfer to OU and finish out his last 2 years.

There is always a way and sometimes our kids have to learn that IF God says no to something, it's because He has something better in store for us. (Charlie's preference was to go straight to OU when he graduated last June, rather than go to Community College.) Or His timing is better. Come to think of it, I need to be reminded of that!