What a difference a day can make!

Yesterday we did these stupid bleachers. Nothing that wasn’t doable, that’s for sure. If there is one thing about this competition I am learning is that its my heart that needs to be the biggest loser! Loser of all the stupid baggage I carry around with me! That’s not to say that my butt couldn’t use a very extreme makeover, I’m just saying that there is no doubt in my mind what has caused me to be fat.

After a stupid game of soccer that I did NOT want to play, it brought back way too many painful memories of being picked last at dodgeball, kickball, baseball, and… you get the picture, I walked around pissy. And then I realized that if I didn’t play I was making it harder on my team because there was less people. So I played. I scored 3 goals, however, I do believe the goalie went a little easy one me and I missed way more than I got in, but it was still kind of cool. But just for the record, I hate playing soccer, and NEVER want to play it again.

Then yesterday it was the bleachers, and before I even started I heard this stupid voice ‘you’ll never be good enough’ and by the time I was up and down the second row of bleachers I was fighting on the inside a really bad case of the ‘you’ll never be good enoughs’ and it was a pretty bad case, I think fighting that was harder than the actual exercise if you really want to know. I was trying so hard to just say scripture and say ‘I am God’s girl’ though thinking back now, I never asked God for help. DUH. Thankfully Joel came up to me, and made me cry and got some garbage out. It was hard but good.

Went to church and was so excited to find out that Dean was leading worship. God is on our side, Lead me to the Cross, My Deliverer, and Hope Now. I weaped through ‘Lead me’, I just had so much to get out. And it wasn’t easy, me and God, me weaping, Him holding. Jesus tears.

Then Hope Now. WOW! The words blew me away (they are at the bottom).

So its Sunday today and I went to work out with Maggie and Elizabeth, I showed them the workout that Joel had shown me about a week ago, it felt really awesome to pour into someone what someone had poured into me. It was really cool to get my workout in and help someone else get their best work out in too, and it was early.

Then I ran to walmart to get a bunch of stuff, looking for a medicine ball but the heaviest one they had was 8lbs, that is not big enough… so I am on a quest, I am thinking 12 lbs to do my sit ups with and to hold onto when I do squats at home while I watch TV.

I know that this whole journey is so much work, but having God heal me from this crazy internal bleeding I have, that I didn’t know how deep the wounds were is completey great, no matter how much it hurts at the moment its happening.

Job 11:18 You will be secure, because there is hope; you will look about you and take your rest in safety.



If everything comes down to love
Then just what am I afraid of
When I call out Your name
Something inside awakes in my soul
How quickly I forget I'm Yours

(PRE-CHORUS)
I'm not my own
I've been carried by You
All my life

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(VERSE 2)
When my life is like a storm
Rising waters all I want is the shore
You say I'll be ok
Make it through the rain
You are my shelter my from the storm

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(PRE-CHORUS)
I am not my own
I've been carried by you all my life

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(CHORUS)
Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

(CHORUS 2)
You've become my hearts desires
I will sing Your praises higher
Your love sets me free
(Your love sets me free)
Your love sets me free
(You love sets me free)
Your love sets me free

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