Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)

Friday, September 03, 2010

Long Weekend - Homebody Version...

I took today off to have a four day weekend. I haven't been sleeping well, its due to a few things, coughing, I can't fall asleep after I exercise, and my mind just won't shut down.

I feel like I am constantly on the run but nothing is getting accomplished. Yesterday I cleaned out the pantry, and two shelves in the kitchen, I organized the stuff I am giving my friend for her garage sale, its nice to get rid of 'stuff' and know its going towards something awesome!

I need to pull out my garden this weekend because I don't know when I will have time if I don't do it this weekend, also I decided I'll probably freeze the tomatoes instead of canning just because its easier and less chance of spoilage.

Might even take out the air conditioners this weekend. Its Michigan so it could go either way, but I'm kind of sick of air conditioned house! I'd also like to rip up the carpet in my living room! I would have to eventually get my floors redone, but my carpet is filthy, and I love my floors!

Since I have 4 days I'm going to try to get some running in, shooting to be able to complete 6 miles this weekend!

Also hoping to watch some football this weekend!

I also want to move my computer upstairs!

But here's my heart... Lately I feel like a yo-yo...

My emotions are up and down, and round and round. I feel things are crazy, I do what I'm supposed to do, but I feel like everyone around me is telling me I'm doing it wrong. If I hear from God, am I doing it wrong? How do I know I'm hearing from God? Its backed up in His Word, EVERYTIME I open it. I wonder how Oswald Chambers could have possibly written the perfect devotional for me all those years back and in each verse, it is like God has hand chosen them for me.

I ended up with the most annoying cold. I cough and sound like a barking seal. I was told that the reason I am sick is because my stress level is so high. Well, duh, who you talking to?

I feel like I should do something, but I can't seem to do it, disappointing people makes it hard. The thought of just not being friends with people is hard, not that I would lose any friends, its just that life changes.

All these things seem like leaps of faith. To take a step and not know what's below seems crazy to me. I don't feel like God is telling me to be still, I think He's just telling me that 'I've got something for you, it will be better than you expect, but you've got to take the step with me, remember, once you were blind and now you see, well, we've been working on obedience, and its time to take the next step.

That's hard.

Obedience is truly harder than sacrifice.

1 Sam 15:22 And Samuel said, Hath the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifce, and to hearken than the fat of rams. 1 Samuel 15:22-23 (msg)
22-23 Then Samuel said,
Do you think all God wants are sacrifices—
empty rituals just for show?
He wants you to listen to him!
Plain listening is the thing,
not staging a lavish religious production.
Not doing what God tells you
is far worse than fooling around in the occult.
Getting self-important around God
is far worse than making deals with your dead ancestors.
Because you said No to God's command,
he says No to your kingship.

Yikes, stepping out, afraid but not afraid. Ready for something new but afraid. But I can't live afraid... another great football quote: Play every down like in your life don't ever come off the field asking yourself the questions 'what if' or 'I should have' or 'if I only', don't ask yourself those questions, play every down as it it was your last.

It reminds me of Colossians 4:5 in the second part of the verse, it says to make the most of every opportunity. don't stand on the side lines, be a part of the game, love the things you do in life!

And that's partly why I want to do the half marathon, what an accomplishment, something I never thought I'd do, even if I have to walk some of it, I'm excited!

So that's it! My 'to do' list and my heart...

Make the most of every opportunity!

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