Its been a crazy day. My thoughts have been kind of scattered. So here’s what’s on my mind this Thursday night.
The other day I was Grand River and Telegraph and I was admiring God’s handy work in a Monarch butterfly. I am not sure where the butterfly wanted to go but it looked as though he/she was trying to cross Telegraph, every time a car or truck whizzed by, it created a gust of wind and so many times in the few minutes I was sitting there that poor butterfly ended up right back where it had started from. I thought to myself, “I know exactly how you feel” but it kept at it, and it flew out of my sight, I assume that it made it safely to it’s destination whispering sweetly to me “don’t give up”.
Early today I wrote about a time that I have never felt more loved. I was thinking about that today on my way home. I thought about how different it is for me now. I know that I am loved instead of feeling like I am loved. There is a difference. We walk out our faith because we KNOW we are loved not because we feel it because sometimes we just don’t feel anything at all, but we KNOW that we are loved by others and by God. But I’d be lying if I told you that just knowing is enough… I really do want to feel it too.
You know what else, this one you might find hard to believe. I sometimes admire selfish people. They only think of their own happiness, they don’t do things out of obligation or guilt, they do (or don’t) what they want because they don’t want to. Sometimes it’s true that we can’t make everyone else happy, so we might as well be happy ourselves
And sometimes I would just like to be wanted instead of needed…