Passion



Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)


Wednesday, October 31, 2012

The morning after...

You should never make decisions when you’re hungry, angry, lonely, or tired (HALT). Maybe I shouldn’t blog either but too bad…


It’s the day after the “Big Heist” which I say totally tongue in cheek because we never have had much to steal. Until the robbers decided to steal my peace. I didn’t sleep well, wondering if they were gonna come back. Wondering if I knew them. Probably not, but who knows. And just in case… you’re reading this and it’s you… just bring back my stuff, no questions ask, I’ll hug you, slap you with the spoon, I’ll hug you again, and we can move on.

My house was already in disarray a little and I can’t move anything or put anything back because I have to wait for the detectives. It’s funny when you say to the police officer “those clothes on the floor were there before the robbers”. How embarrassing… whatever.

I keep going to turn on the TV because it’s always on in the background. When I get a new one, should I chain it down?

I wonder what they thought as they were going through my grandma’s jewelry box (that didn’t have much in it) with a big picture that says “Love from the center of who you are” Romans 12:9. Or as they stood under the pictures of my family and a sign that says “our family is blessed by the grace of God”. You know what they probably thought? Nothing. Because I doubt they cared. But little did they know, they have people all over the country… and the world… praying for them. They will be moved.

I’m still not upset about the stuff, though, if you know me, being inconvenienced is the most annoying part to me! I even checked to see if I could hook up my monitor to the cable box to watch my shows…. Nope.

I’m just super tired because I didn’t sleep well last night. I even risked a back ache and slept on the couch. I think I’ll get bells for all the doors and maybe even the windows too. I will be getting plastic for all the windows soon anyway.

I even thought about getting a dog for a minute. Yeah, just a minute. You know I just don’t have time for a dog, nor do I want one or the expense (or the smell! Or the poop). Surely you know I wasn’t thinking clearly at that moment.

I have to go get a new TV… but I am wondering if I should just wait until Thanksgiving since there are always such big sales… but no TV for a month… yikes… I seriously don’t know if I could make it!

I’m trying not to be disheartened by the whole thing. Truthfully, it’s probably NOT someone I know. It’s probably someone who was desperate for money (my stuff = money). I am sure it’s probably an isolated incident. I feel like I need to do something nice for someone. I went out and got bagels for Phyllis this morning at Panera, they are all sliced, so they can be frozen and she can have them whenever she wants. But I feel like the balance can NEVER be on the side of evil. The bible says “do not repay evil with evil but repay evil with good” (Romans 12:21). And I will continue to shine on even in my heart ache (I still am not over everything else that’s going on in my heart).

But this I know. In my struggles, in my brokenness, God is good. When things are hard, or mountains seem impossible to climb, that is when we are at our weakest and God is up to something good, because that isn’t just what He is, it is WHO He is. 2 Cor 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

I just was walking around my house thinking about the person or people who did this. I was thinking about how broken they must be. I started singing the song Remedy. I don’t know why that particular song, it was hard not to cry. It was hard not to pray for them, and pray for myself.

You know, I’m Youth Staff. I was actually thinking on Sunday I don’t even know if I make a difference or if I should continue on… I work with students so they will find Jesus, that they will know the healing of His Love. It is about their eternity, but it is also about their lives. That the healing they find covers their brokenness, the need for alcohol and drugs. That in my hugs and smiles, and tears as I cry with them, they find love. I don’t want someone to be so desperate that they steal my stuff, or anyone elses. That they don’t need to beg for money, because they discover that Jesus is their provider for all things, money, healing, love, courage, whatever is their ache, He is the healer.

He is not only the healer of those who did this to me, He is the healer of me, too. He is the One that can bring love and joy to my heart. I don’t understand it, and find myself thinking that maybe I deserved this… Maybe I somehow deserved it. I don’t know. Maybe I didn’t. whatever. At this point, I just have asked for forgiveness for myself, and each minute (sometimes I have to forgive over and over) for them.

I can only hope that someday, they will find the love of Jesus, and ask for forgiveness as well.

He is the remedy.



Remedy – David Crowder Band

Here we are
Here we are
The broken and used
Mistreated, abused
Here we are

Here You are
Here You are
The beautiful one
Who came like a Son
Here You are

So we lift up our voices
We open our hands
To cling to the love
That we can’t comprehend

Oh, lift up your voices
And lift up your heads
To sing of the love
That has freed us from sin

He is the one
Who has saved us
He is the one
Who embraced us
He is the one who has come
And is coming again
He’s the remedy

Here we are
Here we are
Bandaged and bruised
Awaiting a cure
Here we are


Here You are
Here You are
Our beautiful King
Bringing relief
Here You are with us

So we lift up our voices
And open our hands
Let go of the things
That have kept us from Him

He is the one
Who has saved us
He is the one
Who forgave us
He is the one who has come
And is coming again
He’s the remedy

Oh, I can’t comprehend
I can’t take it all in
Never understand
Such perfect love come

For the broken and beat
For  the wounded and weak
Oh, come fall at His feet

He’s the remedy

He’s the remedy

You are the one
Who has saved us
You are the one
Who forgave us
You are the one who has come
And is coming again
To make it alright
Oh, to make it alright

You’re the remedy

Oh, in us
You’re the remedy

Let us be the remedy
Let us bring the remedy

3 comments:

Mrs. Mac said...

I am sorry to read of your break-in ... there are a lot of desperate people out there .. most burglaries are drug related. I once walked in on burglars around Christmas .. they were upstairs and as I was on the phone with the police, I heard them walking around. Very scary. I hope they get caught.

Jada's Gigi said...

What a perfect song for this moment. Peace, be still, my sister.

Sara said...

Good grief, how did I miss this??? How awful. Praying for those jerks ;) Love you.