Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)

Saturday, November 10, 2012

No regrets just love

I know that it could be misunderstood that I may be regretting my crazy summer, or any part of it.

I don’t.

I just don’t understand.

Most of the time I don’t.

I just have a control problem, I like to know what God has planned.

I know Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose.

So much was revealed this summer to me about a lot of things. It was awesome… and now I’m back in the dark, and I don’t like it one bit.

While it’s true I trust God, I wonder if He’s saying to me “do you really trust Me?” If I feel like He’s left me so that I will seek Him more.

I don’t know.

Do you see a theme here? I don’t know anything.

While I might not know anything… Might not? Ha! That’s funny.

I am thankful.

I’m thankful for love, I’m thankful for Haiti, I’m thankful for El Salvador, I’m thankful for MY WHOLE summer. I learned a lot, I learned to open my heart bigger than I ever thought possible, and I really don’t think I’m done yet.

I’m just afraid. What if it’s never that good again?

That’s scary. I can say that this summer was probably the best I ever had, because I loved.

I hate fear. I won’t be afraid, because love just doesn’t end.

1 John 4:18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love

And I know my blog seems kind of crazy, but I feel like I can’t be the only one who goes through stuff and is afraid to share thinking that people will think I’m weak or vulnerable. Well, I am. But in all things, I give thanks.  And I will never ever be sorry I loved.

1 Thes 5:17-18 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 comment:

Deb said...

I know that God knows - and that's all I need to know. When you get to that place, you will have so much more peace. Let it go. :) That is all. Hugs!