So the cat is now out of the bag as they say, my friend’s, the Dorband 5 are moving to Colorado. I’ve known for a little while, 3 weeks or so, and I’ve held tight to this secret and now it seems a lot more real as people started to find out.
People called me as they found out, I think mainly because they knew I loved those 5. They would cry, and I’d put on a stupid brave face sometimes and sometimes I’d cry right along with them. And sometimes they’d speak “Christianese” to me. They’d say some really stupid corny stuff that Christians tend to say when they don’t know what else to say but they want to sound Holy and trusting. I don’t know, it’s dumb. I hate Christianese, especially if someone is talking to me. I just want to tell them to SHUT THE HELL UP. Yesterday, someone who doesn’t even know me started that whole “it’s gonna be ok, God has a plan” stuff, and I just said “I’m sorry, this sucks, and I don’t speak Christianese”.
Everyone keeps asking me how I am doing. I don’t know, I take each minute as it comes, and some of them I barely make it through, and some I joyfully sob through because I think I’m the luckiest girl on the planet because I got to be Auntie to 3 little boys who stole my heart at first thought. And I got to be friends with two people who truly are the most like Jesus I’ve ever met. They have taught me how to love and to accept it. They have taught me how to give grace because I learned how to receive it.
I’m thankful for years of serving with them.
When thinking about my favorite moments in Youth Ministry, the list is so long, I couldn’t pick just one. And I can barely remember any yucky ones. Isn’t that amazing?!
Two people who believed in God’s love and grace who came to Downriver (I have no idea why anyone would come to the arm pit of Michigan – unless God called them) and changed lives, impacted them with love, these two are world changers and certainly changed my world.
By the time I get back from Haiti, they will be gone. And I am sad. That’s how I am doing. There might be moments when I just stand there and cry because my heart is completely broken, and moments when I laugh so hard thinking about these 5. They have touched my heart in ways I never thought possible.
So I’d like to end with this…
Yes, I know it’s going to be ok
Yes, I know God has a plan
Yes, I know I can go visit (my first plane ticket is already booked)
And yes, this sucks
I was the luckiest person on the planet to have loved them, and that won’t ever changed.
Dorband5, I loveyou every day, no matter what or where.