Ok so would you like some insight into my crazy mind and heart?
Sometimes I am so scared of being held accountable to God for the things I didn’t do that I should have, it scares me so much that I could possibly put myself into a dangerous situation.
Like that one time (and I’ve told this story a million times) I had a friend who relapsed that I went to Cass Corridor to go looking for him. By.myself. I was asked later “what were you going to do if you found him?” My answer was simple (and DUMB) “I don’t know I didn’t think that far ahead”.
Oh rescue syndrome. You cause me to do some really stupid things.
I actually got yelled at by a Pastor. I mean yelled at. I will tell you, I will never do such a dumb thing again… I’ll have a plan, and I will take someone with me…
So yesterday, I am driving in SW Detroit because I was avoiding a huge traffic back up and saw a guy lying on the ground who looked… well… dead.
And so my thoughts start to go crazy….
But what if he wasn’t.
Is that blood on the sidewalk?
Oh gosh, should I call the police?
Maybe I should go help him?
Oh jeez, what if he’s faking and kills me?
What if he’s not, and needs help?
What if Jesus is watching?
How will I answer to God about this man, who surely God loves?
Yes, those were my thoughts.
Ok. Stop for a minute, or at least think this through (as I am driving through a neighborhood to turn around – AND WITNESSED A DRUG DEAL – oh this is my life. Can’t even make this stuff up.
Ok. There’s a barber shop. There’s men in there (I bet they are cute – oh wait get back on track) maybe they can help him. Park far from the guy (that way he can’t steal your keys and take your car). Stay on the phone with your friend in case something happens (his suggestion).
I went into the barbershop and asked if they knew that guy was lying out there.
“There’s a guy out there, he looks… dead. Can you check on him? “
So they go check on him, and I leave. I have no idea what happened, but hopefully the situation was addressed. Whatever it was. I just know I did my best while being careful (maybe I should be more dangerous, but I do have a daughter who loves me and would be really sad if I got stabbed by a crazy guy).
I will pray for him now, I don’t know his name, but God knows him. I don’t always know if I handled it correctly, but I do know that I tried to help that man to the best of my abilities. So maybe I will get a “good job my good and faithful servant” or maybe I’ll get a “you could have done better” but either way, I can only hope that everyday, I move to be more like Him.
And maybe next time I will stick around to find out his name.
1 John 3:18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.