Looking for Him in planning

If you know me I am always planning for the next thing. God made me with some mad organizational skills. The plan A B C and sometimes all the way to Q. Sometimes I can't even help myself. 

I even have my vacation planned out to June.

January a trip to Colorado
March/April to Haiti
May to NYC 
June back to Colorado for a mission trip to Denver :)

Much past that I don't have planned. lol but I do have days tucked away for a buckets retreat if we have another Buck Rogers/wine 5k planned. 

I have started cleaning out to simplify my life in order to move at some point  maybe in two years. I have way too much stuff and I've actually been able to part with much of it. It's been freeing.

The problem with being a planner is that I like to have an end in mind. For winter retreats we pray for kids saved, mission trips we pray for kids to come (and adults), I plan for meals, I have an end in mind. But to be honest I feel kind of open ended and that's an uneasy feeling. What's Your plan God? You know I'll go wherever You lead but can I have a hint? 

Where will I live?
Will I be married?
Will I still work where I work?
Are You gonna blow the doors open to the community center?
Will I feed neighborhoods with the community garden?
Will the provision You give lead lives to You?
What church will I remain in?
How will I serve there?
Should I join a small group?

Shhhh... I'll go where You lead, I'll do what You say.... Word of God speak!!! 

I keep looking for Emmanuel and I seem to find Him in the uncertainty of the future, I find Him in His faithfulness if the past, and I find Him in the now. I find Him in the plan of having no plan.

I don't know what He has planned... Until then... Late night walks dreaming of all the possibilities.


Comments