Thursday nights we have prayer night called Equip. Every week someone new leads it. I seriously love it so much, hearing other people's hearts.
Last Thursday Chris lead it. He introduced us to three different types of prayers and one was just to throw praises up at God (my translation). But can I tell you? It was the sweetest time with God. I was so tired, it was such a crazy day, and all I did was tell God I loved Him. Not for any reasons, just that I love Him and I can't do life without Him.
I knew that today was gonna be a rough sermon because I ride the struggle bus to the Sabbath. I do try to rest but since April I have not taken a Sabbath. It was Sunday's before I committed to a church again, I took my Sunday's at home, relaxed.
Now I am committed to my church and that means "I am in" and I serve on Sunday's (because I love it!!!) but that also means that Sunday's are not a day of rest. At least not the full day at least.
So today we had this amazing service, and let me tell you, I've heard MANY sermons about the Sabbath. I've read about it, but this time maybe my heart just knows it's time. It's time to really take the sabbath seriously. I'm not sure how.
Serve on Sundays, work Monday through Friday, and Saturdays are used for errands.
But there were some things that made me just stop in my tracks.
"The sabbath is Gods way of bringing us back to the reality that we are nothing without Him".
It's so true... I am nothing without Him. And our pastor also said "if you can't turn off from what you think that gives you value, you will never turn on to what actually gives you value.
For a long time I really struggled and still do when people say "you're awesome" for what I do, not for who I am because who I am. And really I don't think I'm all that awesome anyway lol, but people who are doers, busy, are known for what they can get done. And for a long time that was me, I found value in what I accomplished, which isn't really true anymore of me.
The truth is God is clear about the Sabbath, and it's for my own good, and God loves me, and even God took a rest so who do I think I am to think I don't need a rest. On the 7th day He rested, for Himself. And I haven't yet figured out how but I love God and if He says it's important, than it is, and I don't get to choose how I follow, I'm either in... Or out... And I'm in. All in.