I'm not a dreamer for myself. I live my life and do what God calls me to do. I plant gardens and help make soccer fields happen. I see other people dream, and I help them.
But I dreamt. I dreamt of this beautiful house with lots of character. I dreamt of being that neighbor on the block that the kids knew I'd help them with their homework and listen and love them.
I dreamt it being in Detroit tucked away in a sweet neihhborhood.
And then it felt like it all got snatched away. And even though I know God has a plan, I know His way is good, I know... I'm still disappointed and can't help but feel like maybe I should just do what God has created me to do, just serve other people and make their dreams and visions come true.
That's not over dramatic it just feels dumb to dream dreams that probably won't happen.
Oh I don't know.
I'm sad.
I'm disappointed.
It's gonna be ok but I really was happy about this all happening.
Back to the drawing board I guess
Proverbs 13:12 "hope deferred makes the heart sick."
I still trust though
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