Through the tears

"There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love." Washington Irving

Yesterday in the morning before church I knew it was probably destined to be a waste of eye make up day! There is no shame in my game. I cry! 

The combination of tired, the crazy of my dad in the hospital, work,  the joy of youth ministry, and seeing God around every corner and straightaway, it's going to have the end result of tears either happy or sad, or a combination of both.

My friend posted the other day about how when she was overwhelmed she did something that gave her instant gratification.. she does the dishes, I do the same... I bake.

We are going on our 19th day of hospitals and how that has just become a regular part of our lives (not gonna lie, can’t wait for this to be over).  I have to admit something to you, in all this “hard” I have felt more loved than I could possibly imagine.  People ask what they can do and I feel bad saying nothing because there isn’t much but the most important thing is prayer.  I mean what am I supposed to say “I’m dying for a pedicure” or “starbucks” or “hey can you drop off some bananas, we are out” LOL because that’s all I really have. Its’ not like I’m being prideful, there just isn’t much to do.

When I’ve asked, people have stepped into my crazy and helped in so many ways, picking us up lunch, trying to drill stump to put the stuff in, listened, laughed, brought starbucks, dinners, grass cutting, signed papers, given me whole30 thai yumminess.  So much!  And soooo much more!

There have been so many times I have cried because of alllllll the love.  I see it around every corner.  Through every tear I have cried, I have seen the good. 

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