There is something, something that lies deep within you when your parent dies of cancer. Especially if your parent dies at a young age. Will it happen to me? I have always wondered that. It’s a horrible thing to have lurking in your heart. It brings fear and anxiousness.
Today I go for a mammogram, it’s just routine, but nonetheless, I will hold my breath waiting for the results.
Just recently, when having a super emotional day, I asked God what I did to ever deserve to lose my mom. Needless to say, I was having a bad day, and I was sad about wishing I had a momma to talk to. Years ago, I participcated in the 3day walk. If you knew me then, you’ll remember, just as I did after some time spent with God, I worked on this. I worked on bringing glory to God for the decisions He makes. You might also remember that I sprained my ankle (twice) and couldn’t finish past the first day because I couldn’t get my foot back in my shoe. It was a journey. It was so much more than the 3day. It was heartache, and healing, it was sadness and joy. It was crazy. So many people supported me.
I know that whatever the results, there is a reason (though I can’t help but hope that there is no lumps, no cancer). I can’t wait to get this over with! LOL
I think all this emotion comes from deep within because even though I know I shouldn’t, I am a little worried. But I learned a long time ago, you either pray or you worry, you can’t do both. So today I woke up with praises for the King of Kings, in joy and thankfulness, and I will continue to pray all day.
Psalm 100Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth.
2 Worship the Lord with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.
3 Know that the Lord is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his[a];
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
5 For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.