Passion is a gritty kind of love, tough and

optimistic enthusiasm that overcomes negativity and inconvenience to make it

through to the end. (10,000 Reasons Overflow)

Saturday, January 28, 2017


I've been giving some thought to stewardship. I honestly thought I did ok with this one, not perfect. But when someone would say "if someone looked at your taxes or checkbook would they know you loved God?" The answer is yes. But in this last month I've been thinking about it... how much I wasted!

Money spent at Starbucks
Food that I threw away instead of freezing
Choosing to eat out instead of eating at home

I've been on a pretty strict budget. Pinching every penny.

An example is that so
Many times when we had leftover buns we would leave them. I noticed that the soup
Kitchen had tons of buns so I asked my
Friend if I could take them and freeze them. The truth is that buns are only a couple bucks, HOWEVER I've been saving lots of $2 to add up to more money

It's been eye opening to me how much I waste and what a bad steward of God's resources I have been. The thing is I know how to stretch a dollar i just got careless. It's been something God has been working on with me.

When it started I thought it would suffocate me, take away my freedom but to be honest, it's done the opposite. It really has been freeing. I always say "you either manage ________ or it manages you" and I'll be honest I think I've needed to take control for some time now. Nothing bad has happened, but there is no point in waiting until it does. It's been so great, and I don't feel restricted at all or that I'm giving anything up. It's been so great!

I'd like to invite you to really look at how you are spending your money and not
Compare to how the world spends their money but God's view and see how you stack up. You might get an A+ rating or you might need a little work (or a whole lot). Don't over look a little here and a little there. It all adds up!!! I saved $57 this month changing my Starbucks routine from everyday ($3 per day) to only going two times per week. I thought I'd hate it but I like making it myself. Less time spent in the drive thru, less money spent... its good stuff!!

I'm thankful God never stops working on me!!

Thursday, January 26, 2017


Do you ever just sit and dream?

Get real quiet and think “what if?”

I am often on the go, but in my quiet time, I think of how I would change things if I could.  And the crazy thing is most of the things I dream about are in my control.  Lately I’ve been dreaming about the garden.  I have been dreaming of apple trees lining the street.  I dream of the existing garden beds and adding to them.  I dream of trying straw bales and potato boxes. 

I dream of people, from all over the area, working together, laughing, sharing their stories.  All ages, all races, coming together to feed people.  Maybe even exchange a recipe or two ;) How great would it be to have an over-abundance of zucchini that there could be a class of teenagers with a leader, MAKING zucchini bread!  Or making applesauce from apples we picked off trees on the property.

I dream these things, not a wish, but a path, because I know that if God sets it before me, He will make it possible for me to complete. 

I’m excited about a next step that’s about to happen to make these dreams come true! 

Psalm 119:105 Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.

Saturday, January 21, 2017

A lesson in love - a life well loved

When i was a child I had an aunt that was severely disabled. When She was young she lived with my gram and grandpa but with aging parents and her growing needs she had to be put into a nursing home. It was called Madonna. I remember my family had to make her a ward of the state because they couldn't care for her financially but my gram always made sure she had nice clothes visited her and there wasn't a family dinner she wasn't at and they'd bring her home on sundays and other times. We called her "retarded" because that's what they called it back then. No disrespect meant, it was what it was. She was different than us, but we loved her.

I can remember going to Madonna and the smell of urine, I remember being sad to leave her. There are just some things as a child you never understand, and as an adult you don't understand them any better. And that's the truth. I think my faith in God gives me a peace that really does surpass all understanding. I remember that God is good, and sovereign and I accept that He trusts the strongest with His most precious gems.  My aunt was a jewel in our family, she taught us how to love.

I guess in this day and age and I think about how far we've come, and how much further we need to go.  I see people who stand up and fight for what they believe in. They talk about it on Facebook and they get loud and big. You know when people listen the hardest? When you whisper.

From my own experience, when there are loud noise, a back down, back away, and cover my ears. Small sounds like birds chirping, waves rippling, I stop and listen intently at those things.

I am taking a lesson from my aunt today, while her words were very few and far between, her actions and love they made and impact on my life that is forever stamped.

She was the hardest hugger. A lesson I live out. Let my love be silent in words but in strong in action, may my laughter be loud, and may my hugs always be hard!

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Off to a good start!

It's January 17, the day after Martin Luther King Day. It was  the first year in a long time I don't have the day off.

We are only 17 days into 2017 and I've made some very intentional changes. One of them being how I spend my money. I've saved $27 so far just not having Starbucks everyday lol. What a terrible choice that was that became a habit.

I thought buckling down would be constricting but instead it became freeing and more creative! And that's been fun!!! Which is weird! Haha!

I really felt like God had been telling me to spend less. Specifically live on what you made 8 years ago. Truth is i need to save more, spend less. At this point, I can't do that. I have bills that need to be paid off, a trip to Uganda to pay for, but I'm getting there! I've even started mystery shopping to make some extra money to use as a fundraiser for my mission trip to Uganda!

I'm making good choices that will become good habits :).

It feels good to do this! It makes me feel a little regretful of how I spent money in the past but I can't change that. I can say I'm sorry and I can move forward. No shame, no guilt, just thankfulness!

I hope your 2017 is off to a great start!

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

My people

I shared with someone that I was nervous about raising funds about my trip to Uganda. It's a lot of money. I somehow felt at ease once I saw my tshirt for my fundraiser. It was a weird peace, but the one God knew to send at that moment. I might (eh em) cried.

Do you know that my whole life I've been scared? My WHOLE life. My mom died when I was a tot, I was scared my dad would die. Who would take care of me? Literally this was a worry I had my whole life. Let's me honest, I'm too much for just about everybody, who would have wanted that burden?

Because I've been a little (or a lot) too much for most people, I've learned to tame that back, be who I thought they wanted me to be. I always worried people would leave, and because of the loss of my momma at a young age, that's something I was scared of, people leaving.

As I became a single mom I worried about the money to take care of my daughter! Especially when she was sick.

I was always nervous that I couldn't really be myself around people. So I wasn't.

And then it happened, I met people who loved me for who I was because that's how God loves me. There's a remarkable beauty in that.

As you grow older, you realize the people around you aren't always safe. They will have their own agendas, they will be mean and hateful for no reason, other than their own jealousy and ugly pride.

I've learned to be around people who are safe for me. I don't worry about them leaving or not liking me. I know that the advice they give isn't for any benefit of them, but only helpful to me. They cheer me on and calm me down.

These are my people. The people I go places with and do things with that might frighten me or make me look stupid.

The people who say "MAR-gie!!" When I'm crazy or just say my name sweetly when I'm afraid or hug me when there are no words.

I got people.

Bucket people
Serving people
Praying people
Tshirt people
Friend people
Sister people
Haiti people
Church people
Family people
Friend people

I got people. People who love me when I'm scared, make me feel safe.

I'm always a little nervous, but God says "be courageous, I am with you always"

And who am I to argue with "I AM"?

Thanks for being my people

Monday, January 09, 2017

Steps to success

Today someone who doesn't take care of her health said "I had a _____" and I wondered why she didn't take care of herself. But the truth is... I don't always take care of myself!!!

My mom died of breast cancer
My dad had a quadruple bypass and
Countless vascular surgeries
My dad has diabetes...

And what's my excuse? Am I going to wait until it's too late?

So today, after cooking a big meal for my favorite people, I came home and roasted sweet potatoes, zucchini, asparagus, and broccoli. Found some chicken in the freezer for lunch tomorrow. I started back to Weight watchers online last week. Doing great and feeling great!

The truth is there is no time like today to make a difference in our lives. There is no tomorrow.

Want to read your bible more? Start today
Want to send letters to people you love? Start today.
Be encouraging
Be kind
Be loving
Take care of yourself

There are no excuses in success!

Join me !


The truth is I'm a little nervous! Not afraid, really. Just nervous.

I'm going to Uganda.

Which is huge. The cost of the trip, the vaccinations. It's a lot. In 6 months.

It's a lot of money and a big responsibility. The me part of me wants to back out. But the part of me that belongs to God says "He called, I'm going" and thankfully the part of me that belongs to God stuffs a gag in the me part of me's mouth, gets the duct tape out, and shuts me up.

I've done everything from figuring out how much I need per week and per day. Yes. I'm making myself nuts!!

Just like every other aspect of my life, I need


I believe He will. I don't just believe it, I know it. I don't know how it will all work out, but I know at some point, At every point, I'll stand in awe of it all.

Here I am, send me!!!

Monday, January 02, 2017

Happy birthday! Happy 2017!

Happy birthday to me!!

I feel so thankful for a wonderful birthday!!

I made a huge pot of sauce hoping to have friends with me at church for my birthday and come over for lunch, but it was a simple day surrounded by just a few people and it was perfect, and now I have leftover sauce which is always a good thing!!

The day was really low key! (Except for the 200+ birthday wishes). Scaled back church due to a power issue, and it was glorious! It was like God gave me a reminder... "don't forget child, I'm in control".

I even brought cupcakes for the treats at church but since we didn't have power there wasn't anything else out :) as I saw my homeless friends on the way in, I gave them their normal treat plus a cupcake and thanked them for celebrating with me!!

I took a long nap (1.5 hours) I've been really tired because my back has been bothering me and I haven't been sleeping well. It's gonna be hard to get back into the 4am wake ups that I normally live!!! But it won't take long to be back to 9pm sleeps and 4am wake ups!

We went to see the movie "fences" with Denzel Washington. Wow! What a great movie!!! It made me think about how if we don't find joy in the hard of our lives we will be miserable and stuck. I'd really recommend the movie!

I'm looking forward to 2017!!  I always ask God to use me and I have the opportunity to go to Uganda in 2017! A trip to Washington state to see dear "kids" of mine! A driving trip to the East coast!

I rejoined Weight Watchers to get my physical life back on track!!

I loved 2016 even with all its challenges and I believe 2017 will be filled with its own set of challenges (and goon squad) but every year that we learn, grow, and love, it's a good one!